What Would Conan Do?: October 2015

The Undercroft #7

And on and on it goes.

Go and buy it. For a limited time there will be a special cover and other tamperings attached to this issue, see the selling page for more details, but assume the first hundred or so will be special and of limited supply.

This issue sees the return of +Matthew Adams +Jeremy Duncan +Luke Gearing Ezra Claverie & +Sean Poppe , and the début efforts of James Holloway, +Nicolò Maioli (cover artist), and Louise Perfect. And me!

What we know about the Dead City

The Dead City continues ever onwards and remains resistant to sense. It's apparent that there is an underlying order and consistency with the goings on of the inhabitants, but it's unclear what the cause or the purpose is. I can assure players that the city revealed itself fully and made its plans known, that the undertow is there, occasionally sweeping us all along.

What do we know?

The dead do not often stay dead
The thief (put down by his friends after a failed attempt at curing him resulted in excruciating pain) and the the fanatic (head constricted off by mind worms) continue on "living", but their un-lives are distinct. One is blind and sees only by the light of the living, while one remains in robust health as long as he eats brain matter. Inconsistent.

What becomes of the nobles and peasants we've killed is another mystery, never having stayed long enough to find out.

The city doesn't care
After a few weeks of timidity it became clear that the city was far less chaotic than it was imagined. Instead of a burning hostility we instead found a simmering indifference. The inhabitants have their ways, and they will not be interrupted. The most significant disruptions was the liberation of the colosseum and its gladiators. Has it been ignored because of the injured god of murder that claims it? Or is the city just slow to react?

The lovers know something
The twin lovers of the ivory and grey towers, first advisers to the king, masters of the 10th emanation. have, by royal decree, set their full faculties to freeing the city in its entirety. Their towers were intricate and made no sense, abandoned and rotten. We took the eye of a god and fled, content to return and find what happened to the lovers another day.

The towers are now sealed. Cocooned in crystalline snot and arguing amongst themselves. It's obvious they are heading to a course of action, but no one has returned or heard anything more of them.

We have astral tails
Found via happy accident, and trailed to a church of many gods and sermons. There is a way out.

The shores of the river have beaches of gold
The river flows back and forth seemingly at random, picked over for its meagre offerings of flesh by the stilt people. It washes up from down stream, but we were too fearful to find the source. It is beyond the edge of the city beneath the cliffs, and unkind things come with it.

Flesh is valuable
The rich store it in iron boxes, the richest wear it in all its corpulent glory. The poor are just bones.

Elves of Planehammer

Elves are a seasonal race.

They begin life saturated and full of vitality, a barely restrained energy. As they approach their 100th year they begin to change. Their skin and minds darken, becoming bitter and cruel. The light goes out and they gather together to resent the world. And then, as their 150th year creeps on, the sunlight enters again and the cycle begins anew.

Elves are fixed

Though functionally immortal they aren't as concerned with death as one might assume. When an elf eventually succumbs to some unpleasant end a new one springs up, fully formed. Not even the elves are entirely sure where they come from, but they always greet another of their kind very matter of factly. Of course you are here, at this time, for we must all play our parts.

Every Elf a Player, Every world a Stage

Certain elves live their history so that others do not to forget it. Those in their Summer play heroes and kings, while those in the throes of Winter perform the part of the villain, the beast. They gather at the historic places of these events and recreate them, blow by blow, death by death. If the story was to go any way other than how it was meant to it is taken as an omen of coming change, where once a hero died he lived, where once a darkness was purged it prevailed. They must reassess their past in light of these events.

M	D3+3
WS	2D10+30
BS	2D10+30
S	D3
T	D3
W	D3+2
I	2D10+50
A	1
Dex	2D10+40
Ld	2D10+20
Int	2D10+40
Cl	2D10+10
WP	2D10+40
Fel	2D10+20
Fate points	D3
Age (if under 16 roll again and add it)	10D12/10D20
Mandatory Skills	Excellent Vision Dance/Musicianship/Sing Random

AGE	Skills
16-20	-
21-30	+1
31-40	+2
41-50	+3
51-60	+2
61-70	+1
71-80	-
81-90	-1
91-100	-2
101-110	-3
111-120	-2
121-130	-1
131-140	-
141-150	+1
151-160	+2
161-170	+3
171-170	+2
181-190	+1
191-200	-
201+	-1 etc.

Basic Careers

Elven Chorus

Advance Scheme

Dex

Int

Fel

+10

When a performance happens not everyone is a tragic hero or vile demon. Some must give the hero shelter, or block his progress. These are the nameless elven chorus.

Skill

Acting

Trappings

None

Career Entries

Any elven hero of villain may return to being part of the choir

Career Exits

Girelda, the Humaness

The White

Minstrel

Knight of the Post

Advanced Careers

Girelda, the Humaness

Advance Scheme

Dex

Int

Fel

+20

+10

+20

Girelda the Humaness, loyal companion to Fadl Jory who turned aside the spear of Balachandra. Noble hearted and light spirited, the only human that could outshine an elf in full bloom. She followed Fadl throughout the great wheel her entire life, through countless acts of heroism, until he descended, as all elves do, into winter. Still she followed despite her dismissal and threats of destruction from her former friend. Her loyalty was the end of her and enshrined her in the history of our people.

Skills

Charm

Cook

Storytelling

Wit

Trappings

Dagger

Pot and pans

Constant sunny disposition

Career Entries

Elven Chorus

Career Exits

Fadl Jory, who turned aside the spear of Balachandra

Sonic Attack

In case of Sonic Attack on your district, follow these rules:

If you are making love it is imperative to bring all bodies to orgasm simultaneously.
Do not waste time blocking your ears.
Do not waste time seeking a "sound proofed" shelter.
Try to get as far away from the sonic source as possible
Do not panic
Use your wheels. It is what they are for.
Small babies may be placed inside the special cocoons and should be left, if possible, in shelters.
Do not attempt to use your own limbs.
If no wheels are available, metal, not organic, limbs should be employed whenever practical.

Remember:
In the case of sonic attack survival means "Every man for himself". Statistically more people survive if they think only of themselves. Do not attempt to rescue friends, relatives, loved ones, you have only a few seconds to escape, use those seconds sensibly or you will inevitably die

Think only of yourself
Do not panic
Think only of yourself

These are the first signs of sonic attack:
You will notice small objects - such as ornaments - oscillating
You will notice vibrations in your diaphragm
You will hear a distand hissing in your ears
You will feel the need to vomit
You will feel dizzy
You will have difficulty focussing
You will need to breathe more rapidly
There will be bleeding from orifices
There will be an ache in the pelvic region
You may be subject to fits of hysterical shouting or even laughter
These are all sign of imminent sonic destruction
Your only protection is flight
If you are less than ten years old remain in your shelter and use your cocoon

Remember - you can help no one else

You can help no one else

Do not panic

Think only of yourself

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