Tieflings: Sins of the Mother

(Pictures that are obviously by Matthew Adams are by Matthew Adams)

Demon blood dies hard in the veins of man. Each child born on down the line attracts a gathering of aunties hoping they don't gain sight of horns or fangs or worse. They stand in silence, two buckets of water at the ready. One warm and clean, one cold and deep.

Tiefling class

As Scoundrels:

Very simple. A specialist may spend 2 skill points at creation or on levelling up to gain +1 attack bonus or 1 spell "slot", i.e. you may memorise a single spell and cast it without blowing everyone up or turning them into piles of eyeballs.

If you don't want to be a gross demon baby then
at least do the sexy tiefling thing right

HOWEVER:

• XP as Specialist and saves as Cleric
• At creation roll on the Sins of the Mother (part 2) table 3 times. Spend 1 of your starting skill points for another roll. Only at creation, you were born with this.
• For any purposes that may be relevant, you count as a demon. If it is important whether you are a demon OR a human, pick the most inconvenient one

Sins of the Mother

If something contradicts a prior roll ask the GM for a do-over.

Step 1: Your skin is a weird colour

1. Black
2. Blue
3. Brown
4. Normal fleshy colour
5. Green
6. Jale
7. Orange
8. Purple
9. Red
10. Ulfire
11. White
12. Yellow

Step 2: You came out wrong

1. Evil eyes
   Your eyes are pitch black. Along with allowing you to see in pitch darkness you may lock eyes with someone and force them to take a magic save. If this save is failed they take -1 to all rolls until you die. They will know that this curse is your fault.
   
   
2. Ram horns
   Almost fashionably demonic. Head-butt people for 1d6 damage
   
   
3. Goat legs (bare bum optional)
   Move 1/3 faster than normal
   
   
4. Corpulence
   You are incredibly fat. Circus fat. Unrelated to consumption. Even if you are starving to death you will still be obscenely fat. +5 CON
   
   
5. Demonic muscles
   Muscles on muscles. 8-pack, square head, so on. +5 strength
   
   
6. Prehensile tail
   Whatever form it takes, you can use it like a weak third hand. Using it to attack is at -4.
   
   
7. Forked tongue 
   You were born to weave falsehoods into words. +1 to any rolls related to lying, disguise or other such things. The DM should give you some slack in non-rolling situations. Your tongue is also literally forked
   
   
8. Useful Wings
   Leathery bat wings, oily vulture feathers, raw bones that make no sense. Whatever form they take means you can fly at your normal movement speed. You can't hide them.
9. Fangs
   Impressive overbite, very obvious. Bite people for 1d6 damage. Every time you win a grapple get a free bite if you like.
   
   
10. Gills
    Breath under water without trouble. They flap and generally look unpleasant while you talk.
    
    
11. Trunk
    Instead of a nose, a glorious trunk. Not quite elephant length, rather 3d20 inches long. It can hold things and otherwise twitch about disturbingly. If it's at least 6 inches you can hold a knife with it.
    
    
12. Extra arm
    Random handedness, random position. Still, an extra arm.
    
    
13. Udders
    Your breasts are bulbous and sagging. Milk can be extruded from them with the same effects as your blood. By default that's just nourishing.
    
    
14. Orix horns
    So much more sinister than goat horns. Not very useful for butting people, but it is mightily impressive. +1 to reaction rolls.
    
    
15. 2d6 extra nipples
    Like it says. They serve no function beyond your normal nip abilities.
    
    
16. Crow feet
    Your leg pinch off below the knee into huge crow feet. Clawed (1d4 damage) and spindly.
    
    
17. Pig tail
    Not prehensile, not very useful. Painful to tuck it in, best to let it hang.
    
    
18. Lobster hands
    You only have two big fat fingers on each hand. -1 to all manual dexterity rolls. However they're meaty and strong. +1 to any rolls involving crushing stuff in your hands
    
    
19. Albino
    Pale white skin, pink eyes, blond hair. -1 to everything while in the sunshine
    
    
20. Extra eye
    Random location on your body, you have an extra eye.
    
    
21. Atrophy
    A random limb is withered. Anything performed with that member is at -2.
    
    
22. Beak
    You talk like the bird from The Neverending Story 2. Also feel free to peck people's eyes out for 1d4
    
    
23. Beast with a thousand...
    1.eyes 2.noses 3. ears 4. dicks/vaginas 5. tongues 6. teeth. All over your body.
    
    
24. Bird legs
    See Crow Feet, but all the way to the torso
    
    
25. Acid blood
    When you take more than 5 points of damage in one go everyone adjacent to you saves vs. breath or gets your alien blood on them. 1d4 damage per turn until a round is spent wiping it off.
    
    
26. Boils
    Pustules, foetid sores, weeping skin, you have it all. It doesn't cause you much discomfort, you're used to it. The exact blemishes come and go, but you are always covered in them. -2 to reaction rolls. However, sentient, sane folks must save vs poison to hold it togehter enough to grapple you. If they fail they miss their turn from flinching.
    
    
27. Breathe fire
    Bit of a misnomer. Rather than exhaling fire you may breathe it in. Smoke, flames, volcanic fumes, all good to you. Normal heat doesn't bother you, though a magic fireball will still mess you up.
    
    
28. Centaur
    Go here and roll a d6. You are half that.
    
    
29. Claws
    Strong stinky claws grow from your fingers and toes. Shoes may prove a problem. 1 in 6 chance they're retractable. D4 damage
    
    
30. Cyclops
    You've got one big eye in the middle of your forehead. -1 to shooting things. However, you can see the future. This sight is limited to the event of your own death. In game terms, this means you can tell the GM once per game "this isn't how I die", and you don't. Can't be used where you're deliberately putting yourself in a fatal situation.
    
    
31. Blood hunger
    The blood of fiends flows close to the surface. Once per day you can go mental, screaming and raging. All you can do is attack, rip and tear. No sensible chatting or fine manipulation. Let it all out slugger. Get +(your level) to all rolls involving hitting and damaging. You must attack every round, even if it's your friends. You only quell the blood hunger on a successful poison save (taken at the start of your turn if you want) or when rendered unconscious.
    
    
32. Excrement blood
    Yes, poo blood. It flows thickly through your veins. If your skin is pale you are streaked with dark veins. If you take 5+ damage in one go everyone near you must save vs. poison or be stunned from the stink and getting blood-poo in their hair.
    
    
33. Metal blood
    Liquid metal! Silver veins. People wounding (5+) you need to save vs. breath or take 1d6 damage from molten hot metal
    
    
34. Mucous blood
    Thick green-yellow filth. If you're ever told you're bleeding out get bonuses to not do it. Your blood is slow and sticky.
    
    
35. Mud blood
    Peaty earth blood. Smells nice.
    
    
36. Poison blood
    Save vs breath or have to save vs. poison from getting this in your mouth. Anyone failing dies. Yup.
    
    
37. Bird blood
    Small sparrows burst out of any suitably severe wound (5+). This is incredibly painful, causing 1d6 damage, but the birds fly right at the enemy's face, giving him -2 to stuff and dealing d6 damage. Every turn more birds burst out unless you put a hand over it and make calming noises to them. After the enemy is dead they just fly away.
    
    
38. Tar blood
    Thick and black. Anyone causing you 5+ damage bust pass a strength test or their weapon gets stuck in you.
    
    
39. Plant blood
    White/green sap blood. You are always fragrant.
    
    
40. Vomit blood
    Stinking chunky filth bursts out of wounds (5+) with great pressure. Saves vs breath to anyone next to you. They must save vs magic or roll on this list.
    
    
41. Wind blood
    A yawning portal to Pandemonium lays at your heart. When wounded (5+) the yowling madness escapes. Everyone except the tiefling must save vs magic or be stunned for a turn.
    
    
42. Boneless
    Born without bones, a truly horrific experience for those witnessing. You can't wear armour because of your fluid form, but otherwise function normally. Small spaces are pretty easy to deal with.
    
    
43. Corrosive vomit
    Once per day you may squirt out your guts. This deals 1d10 damage and ignores armour. Saves vs breath for half.
    
    
44. Crown of flesh
    You have a series of protruding growths on your head that look distinctly crown-like. +3 reaction from demons. -1 from everyone else.
    
    
45. Detachable limbs
    If a limb is severed it still functions normally. However they don't reattach themselves. Instead you'd need to brace them to yourself some how. This applies to everything, even your head. Dismemberment still hurts and can kill you, but only through damage, not automatically.
    
    
46. Dripping puss
    You leave a trail of thick red & green puss everywhere you go. It stinks, makes you easy to follow and attracts flies. -2 reaction in confined spaces and +2 to track you.
    
    
47. Emaciated
    Always painfully thin regardless of lifestyle. You only need to eat half as much as a normal person.
    
    
48. Enormous head
    Your head is 2d2 times as big as normal, giving you an ogre-ey look. Helmets no longer fit.
    
    
49. Extra joints
    A random limb has extra joints. Your unusual snake-like movements make it very hard to grapple you. +2 on grapple tests.
    
    
50. Back mouth
    You have a second mouth in the back of your head. You don't control it and should be considered a separate character with a distinct personality. It can and in fact needs to eat and drink, but you have no idea where it all goes.
    
    
51. Eyestalks
    Your eyes extend from your sockets on stalks. Besides being a bit gross it isn't hugly useful. -1 in grapple test 'cos people quickly learn to grab you by the eyeballs.
    
    
52. Feathers
    50/50 partial/full coverage. If partial, roll for location. It'll be symmetrical. Roll on the skin colour table for a suitable colour for them.
    
    
53. Faceless
    You were born with no eyes, no nose, no ears or mouth! The demonchild can't speak but seems to hear and see perfectly well. Doesn't need food or water to survive.
    
    
54. Fits
    Save vs. magic when exposed to a certain trigger (see table) or fit out, foaming at the mouth. Save each turn to come round. When recovered you are at -4 to everything until you rest.
    
    
55. Foetid touch
    Your hands are slick and sweaty with disease. If anything you touch comes into contact with an open wound or someone's mouth they must save vs poison or contract dysentery.
    
    
56. Fur
    It can be patchy or luxurious, your choice. Slight resistance to mundane cold.
    
    
57. Huge X
    One random limb is twice as big as it should be. Double its damage.
    
    
58. Spines
    A crest of spines runs from your forehead, down your back and to the base of your spine. You need to get creative with clothing. -1 to people grappling you, those things hurt.
    
    
59. Headless
    Born without a head. You can sense everything within 20 metres of you as though you had normal senses, somehow. Unfortunately you do still need to eat by stuffing book and water down an unpleasant hole in your neck stump. Eesh.
    
    
60. Hideous
    You're ugly as sin. But normal ugly. A terribly ugly person. People often judge you by it and consider it to represent your true nature. -2 to reaction rolls and loyalty checks.
    
    
61. Frog legs
    You have long bouncy frog legs. You appear smaller because of how you stand (like a frog) but you're normal height. You can jump 15 feet straight upwards.
    
    
62. Hunchback
    You have a malformed hump back. Armour costs three times as much since it must be custom made.
    
    
63. Hypnotic gaze
    Lock eyes with someone and speak gently to them with your demon tongue. Once per day, as charm person.
    
    
64. Inside out
    OH DEAR GOD LET IT DIE. Functionally uninteresting, but your skin is inside out. You leave sticky patches when you sit down and can fake death really well.
    
    
65. Conjoined internal twinYour parents dismissed your friend as imaginary, a result of the other children being scared of you. Only when they put their ears to your chest and heard to voice inside did they come to realise when you were. Your inside-brother gives good advice, but is very pre-occupied with self preservation. You are his world.
    
    
66. Hatred
    You hate something (see trigger table). While in its presence you gain -1 to all non violent rolls and +1 to the opposite. You must save vs. magic to not assault your source of hatred if given the opportunity.
    
    
67. Large ears
    Large and saggy like an elephant. Keeps you cool in the summer but otherwise harmless.
    
    
68. Thick skin
    Your basic AC is increased to 13 due to your crusty, calloused skin. Constantly itchy.
    
    
69. Long legs
    Your legs are twice as long as they should be. You can move 1/3 faster than other people, but your height is often a problem.
    
    
70. Long neck
    Long snakelike neck. You can twist it 180 degrees!
    
    
71. Long nose
    Long and saggy. -1 in grapples 'cos people tend to grab it.
    
    
72. Mad as trousers
    You're generally a bit barmy and once per game the DM can switch a decision you make to the opposite if they think you've not been suitably unhinged.
    
    
73. Immune to magic
    Magic washes over you like water. Any magic that demands an internal change in your will have no effect. You can't be mind controlled, exploded or healed. However a fireball or summoned hyena could still do you in.
    
    
74. Mane
    You have a fabulous mane.
    
    
75. Face twin
    Emerging from a random location (see table) is a malformed foetal twin. It gibbers and twitches at convenient intervals. Screams when in the presence of something (trigger table)
    
    
76. Massive smartness
    You're were born with knowledge, an old soul. Probably literally. You have memories of fire and a fall. Either way, +5 intelligence.
    
    
77. Useless Wings
    Vestigial wings on your back. Their look is up to you, but all they do is flap excitedly.
    
    
78. Shadow
    Your shadow is an active limb. Anything it falls on can be manipulated as though you touched it. Unfortunately this also goes for damage. If someone stabs your shadow it's like stabbing you.
    
    
79. Multiple heads
    You have an extra head. Create it as a henchman without strength, dexterity or constitution. It will have a class and a personality and demand it's fair cut.
    
    
80. Sharp tongue
    Your tongue is like that of a chameleon, but sharp and strong. You can extend it to 3 metres and use it to grab things or cause d4 damage.
    
    
81. Tiny head
    Your head, and the brain in it, are teeny tiny. -d6 intelligence and charisma. +2 vs mind control effects.
    
    
82. Poison bite
    Once per day you can bite someone and poison them. They must save vs poison or die
    
    
83. Scales
    50/50 partial/full cover. Either way, gives you added protection (base ac 14) and looks good.
    
    
84. Scorpion tail
    A huge chitinous tail erupts from the base of your spine, easily 4 metres long. It can lash out for d6 damage, causing a save vs poison in those taken damage. They must save every turn or take a further d4
    
    
85. Rearranged face
    Randomise that face. You look like a Mr. Potato head. This changes every time you wake up.
    
    
86. Short legs
    Half the length of normal legs. Half movement.
    
    
87. Soulless
    When people look into your mind they see a gaping void. There's nothing. You are spiritually barren. Godly magic can't affect you and you are immune to effects that play with your emotions.
88. Pig snout
    Oink. +2 to finding truffles or other stinky ground food
    
    
89. Weird voice
    Your voice...: 1:always echoes 2:booms 3:squeeky like a mouse 4:hissy like a snake 5:slurping, drool covered words 6:only speaks backwards
    
    
90. Suckers
    You have an array of suckers on d3 ransom loactions. These assist in grappling (+1 per location) and can hold things. Also look gross.
    
    
91. Thorns
    Your skin is covered in fine, small thorns that break off when brushed against like a cactus or rose. d2 automatic damage to anyone you touch or grapple. The life of a thorny tiefling is a lonely one.
    
    
92. Impressive Eyebrows
    Enormous or exotic, whatever form they take they are mightily interesting.
    
    
93. Trail of slime
    Your lower body is that of a huge slug. You move at half speed and leave a stinking trail of slime everywhere you go.
    
    
94. Tentacle arm
    A random arm is of the octopoid variety. Very useful for grappling (+2) and fitting into tight spaces.
    
    
95. Tentacle fingers
    Like the arm (above) only less useful and more disgusting. +1 grapple.
    
    
96. Unnatural appetite
    You eat and only eat: 1: Blood 2:Children 3:Dung 4:Hair 5:Paint 6:Pets 7:Teeth 8:Tears. You need nothing else!
    
    
97. VileYou unconsciously act in ways that offend others. Most people learn to hate you pretty quickly. -10 Charisma
    
    
98. Snail Skin
    Your skin is covered with the thin delicate shell of a snail. It cracks and oozes easily, offering no protection. All it does is give you the appearance of sappy bark.
    
    
99. Radiant
    Your skin glows faintly like the fires of hell. It is alluring. +3 reaction/intimidation rolls. Also casts a dull light, like a candle.
    
    
100. Demonbreed
     You are resilient and powerful, people whisper that your demonic heritage is closer than your mother claimed. Double your HP and optionally remove one Sin of your choice.
     
     

Location Maker (roll d12)

When you need a random location, come here

Sub-tables

1- Head

1. L.Eye
2. R.Eye
3. L.Ear
4. R.Ear
5. Nose
6. Mouth
7. Forehead
8. Back of the head
9. Top of the head
10. Neck

2,3- Chest

1. L.Breast
2. R.Breast
3. Middle of your chest
4. Back

4- Abdomen

1. Stomach
2. Dick
3. Bum

5,6- Right/left arm

1. Shoulder
2. Elbow
3. Somewhere inconveniently in-between

7,8- Right/Left Hand

1. Palm
2. Back of hand
3. End of a finger

9,10- Right/Left Leg

1. Thigh
2. Knee
3. Shin

11,12-Right/left foot

1. Top of foot
2. End of toe
3. Sole of foot

Trigger Table

1. Critics
2. Music
3. Children
4. Philosophers
5. Cats
6. Lightning
7. Rain
8. Direct sunshine
9. Heights
10. Pain
11. Sexual attraction
12. Water
13. Laughter
14. Fire
15. Confined spaces
16. The touch of iron
17. Insects
18. Priests
19. Blood
20. Physical contact

The Empires

The Empires derivative common name for a fluid cultural area formally known as the Commonwealth
Characterised by ruins. People living out of the glory of the past, shattered by a tepid war to claim the seat of the Autarch. The succession war has carried on in its current state for generations, an amount of time so great that the common people don't think of it as a war, rather just the state of things.

The outside world knows them as mercenaries and adventurers. This blasted land produces them seemingly without end, the weary and the war-hungry, stumbling out of the dust looking for what they cannot find here.

There are more cities than this. The Great City was vast, stretching from horizon to horizon, so old that it's docks now sit far inland as the sea retreats from her. But this is some examples of her remnants.

The Empire and its neighbours

Link to the big version

Language
They speak a non-gendered language. This is cause for embarrassment when among foreign people, as they default to referring to everyone as women, and have great trouble differentiating gender linguistically. Possibly the source of the belief that Empiric mercenaries refer to everyone as women because of barbarian arrogance and a desire to demean other warriors as weak, but it's merely a matter of linguistic confusion.

Roads
There are extensive roads between the cities, but they are closed by order of the last Autarch. In disrepair and patrolled by ulans, who have royal writ to claim any belongings of trespassers). They are dangerous and avoided by all.

Ulans stalk the highways

Example City-States

Great Lady's house

White Ape City
Ruler: The Mighty Opener, Soul of Darkness,

If it were not redundant to call any city among the empires "ancient" White Ape City would earn that moniker. Temple city to the Great Lady Under Earth and at its highest peak her own residence and, by relation, entrance to the underworld.

Though not the most populous, it is opulent. Even modest citizens can live among the carven arches and endlessly repeating grotesques depicting scenes from the House of the Great Lady.

The city gains its name from the intelligent white gorillas that are allowed to lope around the city. They are considered to be guides to the underworld and contribute to the city's safety. Most people are hesitant to risk harming or angering them.

Carnifex
Ruler: The Carnifex
A cold and blasted hill, honeycombed with tunnels and cells. When the wind blows at the right angle and with enough spite it makes the city-hill moan with a thousand hopeless voices.

The wealthiest citizens live at the bottom of the hill in dark wooden houses, huddled together against the wind and noise. As you travel further and further up the mound they become poorer and poorer. The worst wretches live alongside the prisoners kept in the few functional cells left in the vast tunnels.

At the very top is the house of the carnifex and her apprentices. Masked and silent, she rules from on high. Her sword is the sum of the law, pray her masked agents do not take you in the night for breaking the unspoken law.

Gateway of Gods
Ruler: The Masterful Keeper of Gods

The twin rivers that flow through the Empires are the remit of The Flood-Storm, a god both OF and which IS the river system. The Flood-Storm ensures that the seasonal floods and other equally important river activities remain in place.

You will find the House of the Flood-Storm here, at Gateway of Gods, sitting atop the antiquated system of gates and channels that has the power to withhold and unleash the rivers. It's priesthood has evolved around its arcane operation, with the Keeper of Gods as its high priest, and bodily representative of the Flood-Storm when she is needed. At her command the waters were withheld and mountains flooded, thus both the White Tree Mire and Concourse of Copper was formed.

Gateway of Gods

The Gate of the Sun-Child
Ruler:  The Yellow Empress, the Power Perverse

The Gate of the Sun-Child is believed to be the closest point to the sun as it crosses the sky on its way to the underworld to determine the fate of the dead. At no other place is the Sun-Child's numinous power more apparent.

A caste of column builders call this city-state home. They mine the fine white stones from their quarries and fashion them into taller and taller pillars, upon which the wealthy clamber in order to be closer to the Sun-Child. Taller and taller columns require more and more advanced and elaborate constructions, all in order to prove the godliness of its owner and to allow them to look down upon others.

The construction of these pillars drives the city to expand and plunder.

City of the Emerald Throne
Ruler: The Amaranthine Vizier

Before the Gate of Gods redirected the Slow River, the Emerald Throne was home to only it's ruler and her staff. The great basalt ziggurat of the Emerald Throne is the seclusium of  The Amaranthine Vizier, who some suspect is THE Amaranthine Vizier, who advised the last Autarch and was suspected of being the true power behind the throne.

Since the arrival of the Slow River and its flood waters, others have come, flocking to live in the shadow of the ziggurat. Food is abundant and rival cities are fearful of the Vizier, who for now has seen fit to stay in her seclusium pursuing whatever it is brought him here to begin with.

Like this, but imagine cranes as well

Fort of the People at the Edge
Ruler:  The Manifold Gatherer

Sat on the edge of the Concourse of Copper, the starved river.

Once a vast port stretching for miles along its bank, now its inhabited area is largely confined to still operable loading cranes and the buttresses that once formed the solid walls of the river bank.

They maintain fields in the rich, damp soil of the riverbed, producing a vast surplus of food. In addition, they are the largest producer of Yellow Sun-Child, a thick, sometimes viscous, tea enjoyed by all levels of society. It numbs the senses and mouth, to which can be attributed the characteristic drawl and slow speech that foreigners associate so closely with the Empires.

The Impregnable City

Ruler: The Voluminous Shepherd, Eater of Hearts

Its name refers to the metaphorical nature of the city, rather than a measure of its assailability. Indeed, it has been taken and sacked many times since the beginning of the succession. Rather it is a statement regarding its origin as the necropolis of the Great City, which of course lies splintered every which way can be imagined.

Death can not be overcome, of which the residents are grimly aware. Their livelihoods are found in the acceptance and proper treatment of corpses. From all corners of the world people send their dead here. Great caravans arrive carrying dead kings from lands most people have never even heard of, all to be interred, burned, dismembered, preserved or otherwise attended by the citizens of the necropolis. Their knowledge of burial rites is immense and eerily up to date.

You can often spot the tell-tale rheumy eyes* of a member of the polis under foreign garb, just as they slip off the caravans and melt into the crypts and laboratories to report what they have learned. Ostensibly adding to their professional knowledge, but those ears can't help what else they may learn.

*Dark Water Corpse Dust, another source of wealth, is not good for the sinuses

Seven Orchard City
Ruler:  The Green Lion

Seven orchards for seven families. Not long ago it was simply Orchard City, and for miles at its approach you would be met with the sweet smell of pear blossoms, date palms row by row, tended by the armies of fieldhands.

Now there is little land left, the rows of trees are drowned in the White Tree Mire, a gift from the Gateway of Gods. As they give, they take away, or give so much you can take no more.


The Bear Tower
Ruler: The Unconquerable Monster, the Hidden Guest of the Bear Tower

The bear tower is a crumbling spire at the terminus of a meandering and shattered wall, at places scores of metres thick, clad in metal.

The Bear Tower itself takes in young children and raises them to become animal tamers. More than mere tricks, they can break any animal and produce extraordinary feats. At some point in life each tamer takes a lion or bear in marriage, after which they shun human lovers.

Under a member of the Bear Tower an animal will be tested and either broken or moulded into a focused machine, bent to whatever end it was intended for. Many die or are too wounded to continue and are thrown from the tower to be collected by the people living in the shacks and shanties below.

The Ven visit the House Absolute with diplomatic gifts of laser guns

The House Absolute
The seat of governance. Its palatial gardens are of such arcane and perfect design that those searching for it uninvited are unlikely to stumble across it.

Since the succession crisis the halls of the House Absolute have been a petty game of intrigue and jockeying for position. The rulers of the cities come in and out of favour among the courtiers, find themselves invited to the garden parties and dances less and less often.

Somewhere in it's halls is kept the Iron Sceptre of governance, left carelessly on the throne. No one would think to take it by force, only a man who believes he is Autarch, and with the will to make others believe it, can even find it. None so far have done so, regardless of their bombastic claims otherwise.



















Neighbours

Yongardy

A vibrant port city, teeming with humanity. Famous for its judicial system (fairest in all the lands) and being the place to stop for any respectable trade ship darting along the Friendly coast between it's grim storms and spasmodic squalls. Its enormous fortified harbour is a joyous sight, and the last one they will see in a good while for those headed north. No major ports exist in the Empires, where the coast has retreated from the ancient cities and been left to rough border towns to handle. And further, Calipyg's ports are strictly regulated by their mushroom overlords, each barrel and hold inspected and logged on entry and exit. Such a burden of time has meant that most skip it's once bustling waters and continue onto the frozen spires of Vornheim beyond the mountains.

Trade has made it rich, but it's cavalry has made it safe. The city sits in the corridor between the Yellow Kingdoms and the Empires, a plain occupied by nomadic Grass tribes (a rough and violent people), kept in check by decree of the governor and the court of directors. Dragoons are sent out regularly to pillage and burn the roving villages to keep them fearful and to ensure they never grow numerous enough to threaten the Fairest City.

Lost Pages and Cunning Men

I recently received the latest offerings hot off the press over at Lost Pages, and they are as marvellous as ever. I've been carrying Wonder & Wickedness (by one Mr. Strejcek) around like a toddler with a blanket ever since it arrived. Now, I could review it, OR I could rip it off in an act of the most sincere  flattery. Yea, I think I'll do that.

(as seen in longer form in The Undercroft #3)
THE CUNNING MEN OF THE FERN COURT

Folk tales are the leavings of an irrational mind, a black pearl formed around an ill-sitting grain of truth. It is passed around the fire, each hand polishing it more so they can better see the fear on their own faces. But the grain remains and some are not so distracted by the black mirror, intent on staring deeper.

Their arrival wasn't planned. First one, then another, drawn by dreams of a dark sun rising above the primordial canopy of the Fern Court. They didn't know what it was or what would happen when it rose, but they were compelled to find answers. The forest speaks to those with an ear for it, but it talks in omen and subtle metaphor, a growing knot that the cunning can unravel. And they were cunning. They, the kindly ones, the painted folk, the cunning men.

The Fern Court is old, the woods are deep, thick and storied. The villages found there hide behind palisades choked with rose vines, closing their ears to the scratching at the door. The homesteads and charcoal burners are far and wary, the pathways to their homes littered with charms and fetishes against the night. The people on its borders share stories of children being taken from their beds to dance under its boughs.

Indeed, those who call the forest home are isolated, paranoid and prone to eccentricity, but it is not the realm of death one is lead to believe. Merchants cross it, lords claim it, and the very story tellers decrying it lived to learn and continue their tellings.

The forest men  have long memories, and the cunning men loom large in them. A monolith of stability, as permanent and old as the forest, a coming and going as regular and inevitable as the seasons, roaming where their calloused feet take them. The woodsmen might not question the attention of so many magical practitioners but the cunning men do. Each of them was drawn to this place, haunted by dreams and omens until they found themselves beneath its rancorous branches. Now they spend their energies trying to understand why, what brought them here and what the black sun means.

Within the small and quiet world of the woodsmen the tattooed face of the cunning man is a good omen. They rove from settlement to settlement swapping news in exchange for food and shelter, sitting by hearths and hearing what news they have in turn, seeing their sick and blessing their children, and as the nights go on his questions will come. He will ask about the owls and the milk, about the patterns in the frost. Have they seen Baldanders? Did the sparrowhawk fly east at dawn? Did it return by night?

They will answer and he will leave, satisfied but burdened.

Their covenant is both newer and more organised than it would at first seem. Though they travel widely they always return to the seasonal moot to unload their weighted minds. Unusual amongst practitioners of the cunning arts, they share knowledge freely. Every scrap and clue is kept in the hopes of leading to answers, every detail tattooed on their flesh. Volumes are inscribed in their private script, in streaks and swirls the letters abound. In there is everything that they must know, both magical and mundane, it will be preserved and never stolen like other tradition's books of spells so easily lost or destroyed. They stand before their peers, sky clad, and allow an inspection of the season's happenings.

When one of their number dies they take great pains to retrieve and prepare them for one final moot. Their skin is dried and stretched, displayed on a rack for all to come and learn from before it is destroyed utterly.

Cunning Man illustration in issue #3 by Matthew Adams

Spells

1.
Babble

The caster whispers unintelligibly while staring intently at his target. While the muttering continues the fellow will be unable to get their words out, spluttering and becoming confused. Additionally the caster may force the target to say one thing, one single sentence.

This trick can be performed with subtlety, where onlookers would only see the caster muttering like one whose mind had withered roots.

2.
Spleenful led

The caster must have in their possession a fragment of the target: a strand of hair, seminal fluid, toenail, blood and such. With this, they must bind it in mud or clay and throw it as far as they can, out of sight. The target must save vs. magic or from then until the next morning be unable to find their way.

For that period they cannot reliably find their way anywhere without someone leading them forcefully. They will take wrong turns, leave the trail and generally wander aimlessly.

3.
Protection from rain

The caster is immune to the effects of turbulent weather. No rain nor hail will touch him, lightning will dance around him, the wind will die at his tread. But only him, mind. The elements have no strong feelings for his companions.

4.
Read entrails

The creature being used for this spell must be slaughtered especially for this purpose. Creatures stumbled upon or killed for utilitarian purposes are not suitable. For each HD of sacrifice the cunning man may find a vague detail of the answer to one question in the entrails. Hair colour, mannerisms, times, smells, directions, all delivered in as obscure a manner as possible.

5.
Pick up sticks

Some signs are not so subtle as to require a mind awash with magic; the woodsmen mistrust the owls and know to shutter their windows on the new moon. With the knowledge of how the forest connects meanings the caster throws a pocket full of twigs, bones, furs and feathers in the air. Those viewing must save vs. magic or fall to the ground obsessively picking up the assorted debris. Can effect 2HD of sentient targets per caster level.

6.
Zoanthropy

The cunning man must take off his clothes and arrange them neatly and deliberately in a hidden place. Naked, they must walk into the wilderness and with each step lose their mind and body until eventually taking the form of an animal. They may choose what animal to be, but it must be appropriate for the environment and they must try their hardest to imitate the creature or else the trees will notice and the spell will end.

While in animal form they cannot be found through magical means. They may maintain this form for as long as they like, but must save vs. magic every new moon or else lose their minds to the beast and stay that way forever. To return to their old ways they must find their clothes, whereupon they will be reformed.

Many cunning folk have lost their mind through the divine sublimation of the zoanthrope. They still search the forests for Old Father Aldous, whose skin was almost black with writing, who they say glimpsed the horizon of the black sun before he retreated into quietude. At every hamlet and homestead they always ask after sightings of the black hare.

7.
Brittle Twigs & Bird Song

The caster takes a dry twig and snaps it across his knee in full view of his foe. They must save vs. magic or take 1d8 damage and suffer the effects of a broken appendage (caster’s choice).

8.
Path of Guilt

The caster makes a poultice of thorns, rags and soil, with this they scrub the soles of the feet until they bleed freely (1d4 damage). While the blood flows they count as having 6 in 6 stealth and the evidence of their passing is invisible to the mundane eye. Once the bleeding stops the spell wears off and the bloody footprints appear for all to see.







Catastrophes

1. The sorcerer is always covered in moss and small insects. They scutter in and out of his clothes and beard. If he was to sit still for long enough he would eventually look like a rotten tree trunk.
   
   1 in 6 chance a rare and highly toxic hallucinatory mushroom grows in his armpit. He eats them constantly.
   
2. A flash of insight into the meaning of things! The sorcerer must immediately go to a certain place and do a certain thing. This thing will be seemingly mundane and meaningless, such as placing a sandal half way up a certain mountain, or standing under a certain waterfall while reciting the Strictures of Merrywell. If the party do not join him at the next free moment he will disappear on his own for 2d6 weeks and do it himself. 1 in 6 chance he never comes back.
   
3. The sorcerer is overwhelmed by implied meaning and endless connections. Before him is a vast conspiracy between the squirrels and the daffodils, they hide their nuts in the pattern of the constellation of the Bull and only remove his eye on Wednesdays, the oak leaves fall but spin only counter clockwise... They are paralysed with the truth and can only be forcibly lead around for 1d4 days. They may memorise twice the normal spells during this period, since the sideways logic comes more naturally.
    
4. For one random fellow close to this catastrophe the veil of lies is ripped and the black sun replaces our own. It will bleed, thick puss dripping down the sky. The trees will buckle, the walls will fester and boil and they will fall to their knees as their sanity leaves them in a boiling puddle of filth.
   
   Save vs. magic or die. If it dies, then the caster must save vs. magic or die as he sees the light in the burst flesh bag that got caught up in this mess. If he dies then everyone within sight of him must save or die. Closing your eyes won’t help, you won’t need eyes when the dark sun rises.
   
5. The cunning man learns that his life is linked to another in the vast web. This can be an object or place. His health and theirs is linked from this day on. Think like a Dryad and their tree, but potentially with a weasel, blueberry bush or toothbrush.
   
6. Caster loses their mind. Believe themselves to be an animal or tree. This lasts for 1d6 days, reroll 6's and add it to the total. Players may control the PC as long as they play along convincingly. Spellcasting ability is lost.
   
7. Rose vines burst out of the cunning man in a huge plasmic sneeze. Everyone within 20 metres of him must save vs. device or be impaled by the foliage for 1d6 damage. The plants are ferocious weeds and will continue to grow. Very pretty, but in a few weeks everything will be covered in spikey rose vines. The cunning man is unharmed, but must disentangle himself from the vines now growing out of him.
   
8. The cunning eye sees the purest empyreal fire, suffusing the darkness with a light so far from the prosaic rays that struggle through the canopy as to be an insult to name it as such. That beauty is seen by few but holds an indescribable fascination for those that have. A feeling beyond words or any other tawdry attempts at communication. It can only be shown.
   
   The caster will emanate light with no fixed point of origin while babbling incoherently. Anyone viewing the light must save vs. magic or grow uncontrollably as the light fills them. They will spontaneously sprout new limbs, their flesh will flow like a flood and they will grow exponentially until the light fades. Their flesh will remain forever malleable and readily absorb more. From here on they are considered horrifying monsters by all, and are very likely blind, deaf, and insane (2 in 3 chance of each).
   
   If you know to do so and are prepared, looking away will avoid this unpleasant fate. However, anyone caught in the area of an individual glutting on emyreal light will be absorbed into the target, dealing 1d10 damage per turn as they are melted into their loving embrace. If they are cut free they will suffer d6 permanent damage from missing flesh and skin.
   
9. The caster mutters constantly, with occasional outbursts. It resembles Tourettes, but instead of obscenities he blurts out cutting truths.
   
10. The recipient of this curse is dragged under the earth by thick roots, whereupon he is stored in a small encystment. He will not starve and cannot escape through normal means, though he can be dug up. Those recovering his encystment will find a sack of flesh, inside of which the poor fellow will be held.
    
    After a time a tree grows on the spot, the fruit of which will fall and split into animals of some local variety. They will speak of the trapped individual, but only to the young and the lonely. After 2d6 years the tree will split like a lily to reveal the sorcerous sufferer, naked and new.
    
11. The sorcerer casts off his clothes and equipment. His takes a sharp stick and ash and inscribes his magical knowledge into his flesh. This takes 1 day per level, during which he will refuse to be disturbed. He will never again wear clothes or bags of anything else that separates him from an intimate connection with the world. Can memorise 2 extra spells.
    
12. The cunning man can talk with animals and plants. However, they all talk like the Cheshire cat and bad lsd dreams. Constantly.

Review: Obscene Serpent Religion

Obscene Serpent Religion is evidence that Rafael Chandler can time travel. He travelled forwards in time to the point where everything I've been thinking about clerics met a logical conclusion and made it into a little death metal CD insert book.

Accusations of time travel aside, this book is eerily timely. For those that haven't read it yet, it's about a snake cult in the vein of the (good) Conan film and describes them almost entirely through random tables. Simple stuff.

It opens on what I feel is its strongest table, letting you roll for one of six possible weird requirements or beliefs of the cult. These are excellent and stay clear or D&Disms and the same old boring "snake cult" nonsense. Instead, Chandler treats them as a real religion that people who aren't completely insane might follow. Crazy! True, they are strange. True, they do kill people. But who hasn't killed someone? They're three dimensional, they defend artistic expression (except for clowns), revere victims of umbilical strangulation as saints, are evangelical in a non-hostile manner, hate ophiophages and don't get me started on St.Siavacia. Through all this they aren't complete anathema to life, their followers aren't just Evil™. It demonstrates some good thinking.

These strangely specific details are what make religions. Traditional D&D supplements paint gods in the blandest, most vanilla way imaginable. Real spiritual traditions have symptoms of organic growth, they aren't tidy and thematically focused on being the God of fucking War/Healing/Eeeeeeevil/Wizards. The baby thing is probably the best example: it's weird, doesn't serve any real purpose, but oozes flavour. It speaks volumes and echoes the strange traditions that current religious traditions follow without aping them (how many fantasy religions make a habit of eating their god once a week?). Why do they think that way? Where did it start? There's a hinted at history with a minimal amount of space or waffle.

Okay, back on the time travelling thing: the bestowed powers section near the back of the book is totally what I've been doing with clerics. And it's great. The powers are weird and specific and anyone, not only clerics, can have access to them if the snakes dig them. In fact the book barely mentions the Cleric.

My only possible criticism is that not all the tables or entries are mind blowing. But that's fine by me, it's a grab bag. A bloody good one. So good that I think that the random table element really wasn't necessary, it's a waste not to use everything in here since they can all fit alongside each other without trouble. Just crab it and throw it into your campaign in all it's weird and bloody glory. I most certainly intend on doing so. The citizens of Lokossa have just found their new religion and I've found a new book to steal from. Thanks +Rafael Chandler.


You can get it from Lulu and RPGNow

The Jabóbo & the Mystery Cult

Mystery Cults were one of the three flavours of Hellenic religion, and one that hasn't been gamed anywhere near hard enough. Typically RPG religion is a matter of worshipping Angry-Jesus or Pretty-Standard-Nice-Jesus or maybe even Probably-A-Little-Bit-Racist-But-Mostly-Harmless-Shaman-Jesus, and only that. How dreary.

The Hellenes recognised the multiplicity of man and thus offered a rich platter of spirituality in the form of three main branches: the state or local religion (the standard idea of what religion is), mystery cults, and philosophic religions. One person would typically follow the local religion, possibly a mystery cult or two, and rarely a philosophic religion unless they were of the upper classes.


Traits of a Mystery Cult:

1. Observance of the seasonal cycles. Death and renewal were central themes.
2. A focus on secret ceremonies and initiations. Each layer of mystery unveiled offered the initiate new insight into the cult's god.
3. Mystery cults have no interest in doctrine or correct beliefs. It's all about making a strong emotional connection with the initiates with the aim of becoming closer to god.
4. Inducing religious ecstasy, usually through theatre, chanting, dancing or drugs. You can see the influence of mystery cults on Christian passion plays.
5. The primary goal of a member of the religion was union with god, or whatever it is they worship. Possibly in the form of salvation, spiritual or physical immortality, or redemption.

You can see that the a major difference between this and a state religion is that one is for the masses and one is for the individual. A mystery religion is a very personal experience centred around your journey to unity with the godhead, in whatever way that was appropriate. This system can happily be set alongside traditional cleric classes or my previously explored ideas of killing them off and replacing them with random tables of stuff. You can have a religion and be part of a mystery cult or two (or three) as long as your god doesn't have a problem with it. Even then, it's conceivable that a god would have many mystery cults dedicated to them. Think about all the Christian heresies, look at the passion plays, go read about the cult of Mary. Easy stuff.

Jabóbo fertility cult of the Prior Kairnlaw

Jabóbos flourish in Prior Kairnlaw as they do nowhere else on earth. The beasts are big quasi-bipeds, about twice the size of a man. They are cleanly (they wash themselves in the manner of cats), short-muzzled, small-eared and, except for their thick, stubbish tails and huge thighs, have a rather anthropoid aspect. They are valued for their milk, not their flesh, and no more males than are needed for breeding are ever raised. The females have remarkably pronounced mammary developments which are, if I may so phrase it, directly and immediately exploitable by men. The herdsman’s feeling of communion with such a breed is—imaginably—great. Not to put too fine a point on it, jabóbo cults—originating in various fertility-promoting rituals informally practised by herdsmen—now abound in Prior Kairnlaw. Sacred herds are designated and the rituals centred on them are reported—probably reliably—to have both dionysiac and priapic features. The herds are often called, by local cynics, “sacred seraglios.”

1st Mystery

Better to build strong children than repair broken men.

Initiation: The initiate is staked to the ground while a heard of jabóbos are allowed to meander around them. If the herd settles and grooms then they are accepted into the first mystery. (Reaction test adding your wisdom bonus to the roll, needing 6+)

Reward: Your next character's strength and constitution will be at least 13.

2nd Mystery

If your herd is strong you can make the devil plough.

Initiation: The initiates must suckle from the breast of the herd matron. To do so they must wrestle the the young (though still enormous) young away and be accepted by the matron. They must successfully wrestle away D4 STR 14 young and either have a reaction test of 9 (adding your wis bonus) or wrestle her for 2 rounds (the matron is strength 20). If the young pin them or the matron rejects and resists them then they have failed.

Reward: The character has one chance to say no to the GM, and he must accept it. Once it has been used it is gone.

3rd Mystery

We reap as we sow.

Initiation: The initiates are set amongst the herd naked to engage in the jabóbo mating season. Men must secure a strong female for copulation and possibly defend themselves against an enraged bull (strength 18), asserting their authority over him. Women must attract the amorous attention of the bull. 

Reward: The character is incredibly fecund. Any sex will result in pregnancy and those children will be strong and healthy. What's more, for each child the character spawns they will receive an additional single use rebuttal as seen in the 2nd mystery.

4th Mystery

What is bred in the bone will not leave the flesh.

Initiation: Initiates attempting the 4th mystery present themselves to a Golden Calf. One will be selected to bear its child and shall enter the final circle of the mystery. Men will bear this child, the details are up to you to decide (caesareans are very advanced in the Kairnlaw since they are a nation of herdsmen).

Reward: The character will produce children with anything they have sex with. Any man, any woman, any animal. Their fertility is boundless. However when copulating with members of other species consult the following tables:

Roll 1D6:

1 - The child is a healthy human blessed by the gods, roll 4d6 and keep the best three for its stats. 

2-5 - An animal is born. It is especially fine in every way.

6 - A Golden Calf is born, a chimera of both its parents.

Golden Calf chart:

1. It has the head of the animal that spawned it, 1 in 6 chance it can't speak human language. The thick pelt extends down its back to the base of its spine.
2. The child matures at an astounding rate. Within a month it will be fully grown.
3. Their skin is that of the animal. Their natural armour class is now 13.
4. It looks exactly like its animal parent, except it can talk and is incredibly wise from the moment it's born.
5. They have ungulate legs where human ones should be. They move twice as fast as normal.
6. A tail adorns the base of their spine. It twitches and whirls with a mind of its own but is not altogether unattractive.
7. They are barrel chested and thickly muscled. Strength and constitution 18 when they mature.
8. It receives unquestioning adoration from all those who view it. Save vs. magic or be positively inclined towards it. Save again to strike it, and each future attempt.
9. The child has all the rewards of the highest initiation in the mystery cult.
10. They can talk to animals.
11. Roll twice (re-roll 11s or 12s)
12. Roll three times (re-roll 11s or 12s)

Rumours born of jealousy of those seen as being too successful or too popular are often accused of being golden calves. None in the Kairnlaw would take it as a point of pride to be accused of being the love child of a cultist and a beast.

I think this is all gameable in its current form, but let me know if you think I've left anything out and I'll clear it up. All this stuff has been part of my campaign world for ages so it's easy to forget bits that seem obvious to me.